Jokes

Let me share some jokes i received through mail from a friend..


Why did Ah Beng went to a movie with 18 of his friends?
Because below 18 is not allowed!



Ah Beng wanted to buy a TV set.
He went to a shop and approached by a salesgirl.
Ah Beng : "Do you have color TV ?"
Salesgirl : "Yes."
Ah Beng : "Give me a green one, please "



Ah Beng is filling up an application form for a job.
He supplied the information for the columns on Name, Age, Address etc..
Then he comes to column on "Salary Expected",
but he is not sure of the question.
After much thought... he writes " Yes "



Ah Beng was talking to a telephone operator.
Ah Beng : "What's the time difference between Taipei and Las Vegas ?"
Operator : "Just a minute..."
Ah Beng : "Thank you" and hung up the phone.



Ah Beng went to a store and saw a shiny object.
Ah Beng : "What is that shiny object ?"
Salesgirl : "That is a thermos flask."
Ah Beng : "What does it do ?"
Salesgirl : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"
Ah Beng : "Good, i'll buy one"
The next day, Ah Beng goes to work with his thermo flask.
Colleague : "What is that shiny object ?"
Ah Beng : "It's a thermos flask."
Colleague : "What does it do ?"
Ah Beng : "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold"
Colleague : "What do you have in it?"
Ah Beng : "Two cups of coffee and one cup of ice cream!!"



Ah Beng had just bought a new computer and was using it.
When he encountered some problems..
he decide to use the 'Help' command after some tries.
Soon after, he became very irritated and called the computer retailer.
Ah Beng : "I press the 'F1' key for help, but it's been over half an hour and still nobody come and help me lah ?!"



Ah Beng went to his doctor with two red ears.
The doctor asked him what happened to his ears and he answered,
"I was ironing a shirt and the phone ring.. but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear!"
"Oh dear !" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief.
"But .. what happened to the other ear ?"
Ah Beng answered : "That stupid dumbo called back again!!!"



After completed a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite some time..
Ah Beng proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend.
"It took me only 5 months to do it", Ah Beng brags.
"Five onths ? That's too long", the friend exclaims.
"You fool." Ah Beng replies, "Look at the box, it is writen "FOR 4-7 YRS"".



At a bar in New York, the man beside Ah Beng tells the bartender,
"JOHNNIE WALKER, SINGLE".
and his companion says,
"JACK DANIELS, SINGLE".
The bartender approaches Ah Beng and asks, "And you, Sir ?"
Ah Beng replies : "TAN AH BENG, MARRIED!!"